For as long as I could remember my life was in turmoil. I gained good GCSE results at school and chose to study ‘A’ levels but within a few months my girlfriend and me decided to set up home together and I quit school and got a job in the building trade. Shortly after moving into our flat my girlfriend’s mother and father had a major row and her father moved in with us.
Unfortunately (on reflection) her father had a serious alcohol problem and I got into the habit of drinking with him every night. For her father, drinking was obviously the cause and effect of his depressive state and whilst still living with us he committed suicide. This was such a traumatic time for my girlfriend and me. I lost my job and in order to cope I began drinking more heavily and using drugs.
Eventually it all got too much, there were so many issues and there was such a strain on our relationship that I was like a time bomb waiting to go off and the drink fuelled that. Then one night, whilst heavily under the influence of drink and drugs, I got into a bad fight and received a four-year prison sentence for grievous bodily harm.
Alcohol and drugs were not a problem inside prison but when I came out 3½ years later I had not been prepared for the adjustment needed to getting used to living on the ‘outside’ again. I was met at the gate by friends who took me to the pub to celebrate my release – they thought they were doing me a favour - but after so long without a drink I was ‘flat out’ and continued to drink regularly and heavily for another year. During this time I also started taking class A drugs and as a consequence I started drinking even more to counteract the effect of coming down from the drugs.
Three years after leaving prison and many attempts at quitting drink and drugs, I managed to clean myself up with the help of my counsellor who told me about Amber where, for the first time in twelve years, I felt able to react normally to situations. I realised I could change things in my life for the better. Amber gave me a choice and a different way of life, a good way. I was never judged at Amber and it was the first place where I felt I had something to offer and was valued for that. Counselling and the way staff treated me at Amber gave me confidence and self esteem, time, responsibility and space, which enabled me to turn my life around. So much so that I am now studying for my professional diploma in counselling, a 3 year course that I will complete next year. I also work as a volunteer at the local prison on the drugs awareness programme.
The staff at Amber were such a positive influence on me when I was in a really desperate state. Amber believed in me before I believed in myself and I will never forget it.
Back to top